LocaKitty (locakitty) wrote,

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Warning: More Work Whining

I hate feeling this way. I hate feeling intense dislike for someone. It's not me. It's like pettiness, and I can't deal with it. I didn't know that I was capable of having such strong feelings in a negative fashion, at least not at this age over something so ridiculous as a who has the most power contest when I didn't ever want to play in that kind of contest.
You know, I was happy to do what I did. Order supplies when needed, chase these guys around constantly, oh sure, I complained about the guys, but, hey, you have to complain about something at work, and why not them? I was happy to put up with Don's weirdness and not have health insurance. I turned down an opportunity to work at a large general contracting firm because of the loyalty I felt to this place for hiring me while knowing very little about me. Oh, sure, they had my resume and I had spoken with the big boss, but, honestly, the guy who I would be working with? Never met me. Didn't even know what I looked like.
And now...it comes to this. I can't make it through the day without getting pissy. This dog at work is just the latest piece of bullshit to come walking through the door. I can't believe I let it all get to me, but then, I'm only human, right? Even knowing how much I dislike this place, I still put it before my health. I should have taken a day off, possibly Tuesday, and just rested. Slept all day and ate soup and drank tea and slept some more. But, no. See, if I did that, then no one would be here to answer the phone and so, Don would have to do it. And then, the time wouldn't get collected and fuzzy memories would take over and then it would be all wrong. So, I came in. It's not that no one else CAN do it, it's that no one else WANTS to do it. What I do is beneath everyone apparently. And honestly, I don't want Bobbie to have to do it, she's got enough on her plate already. As do T & Steve. Danielle and Don are probably the only 2 who have the "free time" to do my work, which they seem to think only takes 10 minutes a day to take care of. And, yes, some days, I get everything taken care in less than 30 minutes, but others, it's a continuing battle, not only to chase these guys...I digress...I'm not even going to get into this baloney.
The fact is, I'm one of the lowest paid people in the office now but, I'm the one who has to follow the strictest standards of attendance and when I can leave the building. It's inequity, that's what it is. See, Don told me once that with the exception of him and K, everyone was on equal ground. OK, fine. I am not asking to make as much as Danielle/Steve/Bobbie do, they have seniority over me, but I expect to get raises with the same consistancy that everyone else seems to. See, here's the thing, me being Don's assistant means I won't get shit. And I say this, I HOPE I get to eat crow and he gives me a raise, but I doubt it's going to happen. I would love, on Wednesday to get the papers back for payroll and him to say, "Oh yeah, go ahead and give yourself X amount a week." Never gonna happen. You know why? Why should he pay someone more when he can get away with paying me what he does.
Ask for a raise, you say. Well, not so easy. I know I'm going to be giving notice soon. I can't, in good conscience, ask for a raise, and then bail 2-3 weeks later. It's not my style and I would hate if someone did that to me. So, I can just add lack of raise to the list of reasons why I'm leaving this place and getting the hell out of dodge.
Anyways, I was going to put all this under private and keep it only for me, but, hey, gotta let peeps see what's going on in my life. Of course, most of my posts lately have been whiny work posts, and I should probably warn everyone, so, I shall do that in the topic of this one. I hate whining. I've always hated whining. And, yes, I'm doing something about this predicament, but I hate that it's taking so long for me to resolve all of these issues and to get out of here. I did apply to a job with Manpower today though, I probably won't get it since they want someone with 5 years exec admin asst experience, and I have about 1 and they want it in the "hi tech" industry. Ah well, c'est la vie. I did point out the grammatical/spelling errors in their job description since that was one of the qualifications for the job. If anything, they'll just chalk me up to a snooty bitch and throw out my resume OR they will be all, "hey, this chick is ballsy, let's call her up!"
Either way, whatevs. :)

Thanks for reading, if you got this far. I just needed to dump. I was telling Heather, I just want to crawl in bed for five days and sleep. Sleep off this cold, not have to be here at work, not have to deal with anything. There are happy things though. The twins, it's Friday, I'll be hanging with April and Chris and maybe even Kevin soon. I'll be all artsy fartsy hanging out in coffee shops listening to people play folk music while I go outside and ignore it and watch the hippies dance around like crazed loons. :)
I think this is one of those days where you just want to be hugged by your mommie until all the hurting goes away.

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