LocaKitty (locakitty) wrote,

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David Sedaris

Funniest man alive? Maybe not, but a great reader! :)
First, we had a lovely dinner at Thai China...mmmmmmmmm. I had the sesame chicken and April had the vegetable pad thai. Good stuff. We also got the appetizer platter because I was curious about their crab puffs (worth every penny) and she wanted egg rolls, so it worked out perfectly because we also got satay :)
We arrived at the park and pay near across from Gentle Ben's and scrounged for change to pay the $5 fee. We figured it was easier to just park there instead of scouring for parking closer to the venue (Centennial Hall). I had never been on campus before and it's really nice. I quite enjoyed seeing what I could of it in the growing dark. We found ourselves in a line and thought it was the line to just get in, turns out it was the autograph line, so we said, Ok. Well, it was close to start time, so they had to cut the line off, so no luck for us. We found our seats and sat down and waited for Mr. Sedaris to come out and regale us with tales of his life. This guy shows up and sits down next to April and starts making chit chat with her. I thought she knew him...turns out she had NO CLUE who he was. He was a nice guy though, told us about his snoring cat Fred and his other cat Ethel. Also explained about his ADD so he doesn't read many books, but his friends got him a ticket to see this, so he had to come with them. I think he enjoyed it, I heard him laughing a few times. He was from the UK. Lovely accent. *drool*
*wipes drool away* Where was I? OH RIGHT.

So, David Sedaris comes out and he's all saying hey what's up and starts reading a fable that was great. Made me laugh anyways. Told a few more stories, all but one I had never heard before. The one I had heard was from "Me Talk Pretty One Day" about explaining Easter to a Muslim woman in French. I mistakenly took a drink of water during his telling of that story and almost spit it on the old man sitting in front of me. He doesn't know how lucky he is. Silly old dude. Anyways, so then it was all over and he answered a few questions.

In case you didn't know, David Sedaris is a smoker. A menthol smoker. I mean, he lives in Europe for heaven's sake, you are SUPPOSED to smoke over there, it's just what you do! :)
So, someone said to him, "Have you thought of quitting so you can be here with us longer?" and he very funnily and politely pretty much told this woman to shove it up her ass. I LOVED IT.

Yes, I know, smoking is not healthy, it's smelly, it leaves this coating of brown on everything, but, if he wants to smoke...let him. :) So awesome. Answered a few more questions and then we hauled ass out of there so that we could get in line for autographs. April and I split up and she managed to get in line first, THANK GOODNESS! That line was long. As it was, it took us an hour to get to see him. And, so, here it was, the magic moment.

I had written on the piece of paper "To Alica, OMG WTF" and then he could sign his name. So, as he was writing my name (which he misspelled *sigh*) I said, "Good on you for telling that non smoker where to stick it." (I'm paraphrasing here people, I didn't actually say "stick it" to David Sedaris) And he tells April and I this story of his 2 nights at UCLA where he made the announcement that smokers get priority signing. Then some guy came up to him and said that that was discriminating against non smokers and this guy was all bent out of shape. So, instead of a stamp like probably 95% people of the people got, I got a drawing of a lit cigarette with the words, "Don't Ever Quit" written and then his signature.



This is probably one of my best nights ever :)

Now...if I can just manage a way to get to Trent backstage in Tempe...that could top this.

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