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Part 2 of the Craigslist Chronicles  
04:06pm 09/06/2006
 
 
LocaKitty
So, I received a reply from the craigslist poster:

Hi Alica,

You caught me in front of the computer. Very, very good questions. I certainly respect such attention to details.

The "upon request" part pretty much leaves the dirtiness and ribaldry open for the imagination. The football scenario was just an example of how my twisted mind works. There are many more examples (i.e. maybe we could have sex at a crowded bar whilst watching football together). There are also a few more limitations that have come to mind (i.e. not into urine and feces play. Sorry to bring that up, but somebody else did the other day. Not going there).

To answer your question regarding arrangements to watch the game. I'm not entirely selfish....this is supposed to be a relationship. If we should happen to make it through the summer and you want to watch the game tied up, then fine. I can leave one hand kind of loose so you may operate the remote to hop from game to game. I just don't want my football watching screwed up by your sick sexual needs.

Bottom line is I am looking for the girl that gets dirty and often. The main thing is good healthy old fashioned nasty sex.......and lots of it.

Sincerely,

Dude's name

P.S. - I have a tongue like Gene Simmons and call my penis Thumper.


You know, I would have given it *some* consideration until he told me he actually named his penis and then gave me the name. :)

I am going to ponder a response to this guy. But, right now, I need a nap.
mood: amusedamused
 
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(no subject)
 fermi_daza
 
11:20pm 09/06/2006 (UTC)
 
 
fermi_daza
BAHAHA!! I was thinkin' this guy probably ain't such a bad dude too until he named his penis!! How many times have we had that conversation??!?!?

HEEHEE!!
 
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(no subject)
 lunarcamel
 
11:22pm 09/06/2006 (UTC)
 
 
gazing at the stars and listening to the waltz
1. Sounds like he totally has a sex-based agenda.

2. Sounds like you are a semi-serious consideration.

3. I decided years ago I will not knowingly fuck a dude who has named his penis. It's okay to refer to it in a semi-named form (ie, I refer to certain chunks of my anatomy as "the girls"), but if it's got a capitalized proper now name, no dice.

4. I was kind of considering that this guy might be cool to hang with (sports aside) until the revelation of the named penis.

5. I WANNA KNOW HIS NAME

6. I'm kinda nosy.
 
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(no subject)
 lunarcamel
 
11:23pm 09/06/2006 (UTC)
 
 
gazing at the stars and listening to the waltz
Okay, based on Lisa's comment above, I think I will add:

7. Perhaps you should inform him that, among our gender, named genitalia is caused for not-so-stifled laughter and is pretty close to a deal-breaker.
 
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(no subject)
 locakitty
 
11:24pm 09/06/2006 (UTC)
 
 
LocaKitty: Bucky Sexy
You know, I think I might add that in the reply. :)
picword: Bucky Sexy
 
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If you really must name your penis.
 elf_owl
 
11:42pm 09/06/2006 (UTC)
 
 
Lavra: Ack-ack
And Thumper? Come on.
picword: Ack-ack
 
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Re: If you really must name your penis.
 fydyan
 
12:33am 10/06/2006 (UTC)
 
 
fydyan
Yeah, because did anybody else think Bambi? Probably not the association he was going for...
 
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Re: If you really must name your penis.
 elf_owl
 
12:34am 10/06/2006 (UTC)
 
 
Lavra
I just thought it was a pretty boring nickname for a Penis, and probably common.
 
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Re: If you really must name your penis.
 elf_owl
 
12:53am 10/06/2006 (UTC)
 
 
Lavra: Skeletor
I did not mean to capitalize penis.
picword: Skeletor
 
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(no subject)
 locakitty
 
11:23pm 09/06/2006 (UTC)
 
 
LocaKitty
I can not divulge that information on such a public forum. As for semi-serious consideration enter text here about how I am down on myself for whatever reason blah blah blah.

I'll consider telling you his name...FOR ONE MILLION DOLLARS!

OR

A ticket to Nacho Libre. :)
 
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(no subject)
 speranzosa
 
01:45am 10/06/2006 (UTC)
 
 
Sign Here
ROTFL!! Omg, you rock! :)

Thanks for the laugh of the day!
 
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