I've been having issues with my customer service lately. As in my ability to give great service. I pride myself on making people feel like they are friends and answering their questions and being extremely patient.
My patience is wearing thin. I don't know if it's the hours, the monotony of the job now or if, just maybe, they are getting either more stupid OR more asinine because now people really need the business.
For example, I've noticed an upsurge in The Repeater as a customer. Sample phone call follows:
Me: thank you for calling blah blah blah, how can I help you?
Repeater: do you have any specials?
(seriously, I HATE answering this question. There is this invention called the internet. use it.)
Me: we have blah and blah or blahblah or yadda yadda with a side of blah
Repeater: they have blah and blah or, what was that second one?
Repeater: blahblah or yadda yadda with a side of, was that a side of blah or forfuckssake?
Repeater: with a side of blah!
Please keep in mind, this is all taking place in my ear and the other person is possibly at the end of the block with the volume that the customer must use to be heard.
Repeater: ok, can we do blahblah but only can we modify it so that it can have this and that with a side of that and this?
Me: fine. you'll have to pay the difference.
Repeater: oh. WE'LL HAVE TO PAY THE DIFFERENCE. DO YOU STILL WANT TO DO THAT?
Seriously, I have now been on the phone with this person for about 3 minutes. This is pizza. I am not doing anything that requires extreme mental exertion here, but they are making it quite difficult.
Then we can finish the call. Now, here is how I begin to wind down all phone calls:
Me: Okay, would you like anything else with your order? blefum, blergen or scoobydoo?
Repeater: No, that's it.
Me: Okay, your total is $20. Cash or charge?
Repeater: Charge please.
Me: May I have the number?
Repeater: Oh, you need it now? Oh, hang on. I have to go find it.
FIND IT? Seriously? *sigh*
Repeater: Ok. I'm back.
Me: whenever you're ready.
Repeater: card number is this and that and this.
Me: okay, we'll be there in about...
Repeater: OH! Can we add some blefum?
Me: Yes. Would you like to pay the difference on your card or will that be cash?
Repeater: Oh, you already ran the card?
This is when I want to start banging my head on the wall and throwing things.
But, I can't DO anything about it. I can't make snarky remarks. I can't be rude in any way shape or form. I can't even get a slightly rushed tone in my voice or they get all crazy and start demanding free things because I have inconvenienced them with whatever.
And this is when I really start to lose it. Granted, I haven't had that happen...yet. At least not with myself on the phone. With other employees who don't seem to have the control over their voices as much as others, that's when I get those complaints.
But, they don't see it. Or they just feel that since things are really shitty right now, it's like a pass to just treat us like absolute crap. Or just check their brains at the door.
one of my favorite questions after i've repeated (as an aside, my shift keys suck on the office keyboard, so that's why the capitals are kind of random throughout this post) the specials that we are having they ask, "You don't have anything with fleckum or flerdum?"
Did I say we had that? Did I mention any of those items? Then NO. I don't freaking have any of those things on special. You asked me what the special was and I freaking told you. I didn't forget anything, I didn't leave anything out. I told you what they were.
I had that this evening. "Don't you have anything cheaper or for one person?"
No, this isn't Burger King dude, you don't get to have it your way.
So, I'm appealing to all of you to spread the word. Just try to think of what you are doing when you are in a retail/restaurant situation. Please, don't check your brains at the door. We aren't paid enough to do your thinking for you. "What do you think I should get? Barthen or quaxor?" I don't know lady, I don't know what your particular tastes are. If I tell you to get this, you eat it and don't like it, guess who gets the blame? Me. "I can't believe she pushed off a garlic, anchovy and pineapple pizza on me. Who does that? why would she recommend it and then sell it to me?"
you asked what I recommended, that's what I recommended. I didn't tell you to buy it. By the way, that was an actual order one day. Along with feta. he wanted to get a free replacement pizza at another location because he didn't like it. seriously. "Can i get a replacement from your location? this one was gross."
"did you pick those toppings?"
I think I need a vacation. I really do.