Dear deity in heaven. It was back to back calls until 10:30 tonight, and even after that, it was only about a minute or so. I swear they put us all in the priority queue. Anyways, I knew it would be busy today since yesterday was a holiday, and I'd say 99% of my customer had legit issues that were fairly easily solvable. I love those people. They make me enjoy the job as best as I can enjoy getting paid peanuts.
But these two guys, oh dear oh dear oh dear.
Guy the First, we'll call him angrypants, or AP for short. First, I need to explain how the monthly plans work. You pay in advance for a month of service. It's just like a contract, you have a set number of minutes, if you go over and you have money on your balance, then you can talk for a very high per minute fee (.45/min for the lowest price point plan). If you don't, then you can't make calls to non-network phones until your nights or weekend minutes. You can NOT renew the plan early unless you know how to work the system, which is to change your plan to a daily plan, add the money to your account and then change your plan BACK to the monthly plan. Now you have another month of service. You can put money on the account early and it will auto renew on the expiration date provided that money is still on your balance. Got it? Good.
AP calls in, he put money on his account on 4/29 which gave him until 6/1 for his plan. If you start on the 28th-31st, you get until the 1st (a few extra days, right? niiiiice). His plan expired tonight, no money on the balance, so no phone calls for you mister. He says that he paid cash in the store on 5/17 for his plan to renew. I advise him that I don't see any record of any payment made to his account. As a matter of fact, I am the first rep at a call center to touch his account since 4/29. There were two entrances into his account on 5/3 by store reps, but it doesn't show that anything was done (no payments, plan changes, feature changes, nothing). It's possible that a rep entered the account in error, no way to know, they didn't notate (as per the usual, store reps can be fairly worthless when it comes to prepaid, no commissions = they don't give a fuck).
I tell him, that no record of the payment. Do you still have your receipt? Of course not. So, he says that I will turn his phone back on until 6/17 because he paid for it. This is what I try to explain to him, "Even if the payment was put on there that day, it wouldn't extend your plan out until the 17th, it would have renewed it tonight for another month and would be good until 7/1, not 6/17. I can't credit the account, there is nothing to credit for."
He says AGAIN that he made the payment, he has his bank statement to prove it. I tell him AGAIN, he needs to go to the store because they may have put his payment on someone else's account, it happens, people make mistakes. I tell him this. Then I ask him, "You said you paid in cash. An ATM receipt doesn't prove that you made the payment at the store."
"I paid with a credit card."
"Ok, my mistake, I heard cash. Anyways, the store is going to have to research that payment, I have no record of it."
He cries bullshit and threatens legal action. Ok, sunshine, listen, threatening legal action gives me the ability to end the call right there. Secondly, don't curse at me. I don't get paid enough to deal with it. I tell him not to use foul language, that is his only warning, I will release the call if he does so again.
"I didn't use foul language, I just said I would sue."
"AP, you said BS, that's cursing, I will not tolerate it. I will release the call if you use it or any other foul language again. I understand that you are upset, but we can be adults."
He then tells me he in the military and he can bring things to a whole other level if he has to.
"Are you threatening me?"
"No, but I know my state representative and I will bring a law suit against you all. You will credit my account and you will give me service until the 17th."
Remember what I wrote above? About how it's good for 30 days, no way around it except if you know how to work the system.
"No, I won't be crediting the account. You paid for the month of May, you were given the month of May. There is no record of any other payments made to this account, therefore you WILL need to make a payment in order to have service through the month of June."
"I want a supervisor."
"Fine, no problem, there can be a five to ten minute wait for one, but I will need to put you on hold, and I will check back in with you to let you know how much longer it's going to be."
"Are you kidding me? 10 minutes? This is bullshit."
"I've already warned you sir, I will release this call if you use foul language again." The only reason I didn't release it at that point was because he asked for a supervisor. I'll let it restart the curse clock.
"The fucking release the call."
"Ok." And I did. And, his last screech, seriously, his voice broke. That's how pissed off he was. Firstly, get your fucking story straight. You either paid cash or card. Secondly, shut your cow of a mother up in the background behind you. It's bad enough I have to listen to you threaten me with your "I'm in the military" bullshit, but I don't have to hear her, too. Thirdly, actually LISTENING to what I am fucking telling you will help immensely. If you paid in the store and you didn't get a text message on your phone telling you that a payment was posted to your account and you go along your merry way and never bother, to, ohhhh I don't know check your shit, not my problem. There is some measure of personal responsibility. Fourthly, fuckface, I've told you I am limited in what I can research, and if you don't have your receipt then I really have NO WAY of looking up your order. But the store can look it up, because THEY were the ones who took the payment. And if it was made with a credit card, file a dispute, because they get paid to look into this stuff. I. CAN'T. HELP. YOU.
And now, the "gentleman" who lives in a magical fairy land, where rainbows are made of candy canes, streams are filled with syrup, and pancakes grow on trees (so you can dip them in the syrup streams).
Again, I need to explain how bundles work. If you have a texting bundle, it is good for a month, just like a monthly plan. So, you start on the 28th-31st, you get until the 1st, extra days! Yay! How awesome of us! I can't renew it early. I can't even do the cool plan change thing like you can with the monthly plans, these are just on there. That's all she wrote. No amount of taking it off the account and putting it back on will make it renew early. Unless you are Harry Potter and can magic it away or Bill Gates and rewrite the programming. CAN'T. RENEW. EARLY.
I know it's rough having to make sure that you can manage your money for the next three days to make sure you have enough to pay for that bundle. But, that's where personal responsibility comes in. Either don't make the payment too early OR make a larger payment.
Fairyland dweller asks me to do this, I say that I can not. Impossible, says I. And...here we go.
"They did it for me last time."
"Uh, sir, no, they didn't. It can't be done."
"Get me a supervisor."
"Sure thing, however, they won't be able to make it renew early, either. The system will not allow it to happen."
"Whatever, it's been done before, your supervisor can do it."
"All right, while I get a supervisor, we'll need to get into your account." And I proceed to verify, update and do what I have to do. And, this is the part I really hate, but they have to spell the answer to their account security question. We do this because if they register the account online, they need to spell it the way that we have it. He proceeded to spell out his answer to me like I was a moron. I hate when they do that. "What? Can't you spell 'pizza'?"
"Yes, I am quite capable of spelling 'pizza', however, I need you to spell it in case our spelling differs on the word." (This didn't happen in this conversation, I digressed)
(Note: if anyone has an account security question as "favorite food" the chances are quite great that the answer is "pizza")
Anyways, he spells it, we finish and I let him know that the wait can be five to ten minutes, but that I will check back before then to let him know how much longer and I ask if I can put him on hold while I get a supervisor.
"Yes, fine. God."
And just before I can thank him and say, "Please hold." he lets loose with, "Fucking bitch."
"Excuse me? I don't think so. Have a great night, sir. This call is over."
The team lead behind me, who I was trying to get the attention of while I was on the call, hears my voice go way up and says, "What was that?"
"He called me an effing bitch."
"Oh, ok. Good thing you released it."
I love that team lead. He was talking me down for the next few minutes. :)
I kept the account open to see if he would call back, plus, I got another call in before I could finish the notes, so it was easy to see that he had indeed called right back. He was on hold for a supervisor when I left work.
Ugh. I can't wait to get out of this fucking place. Seriously.