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05:57pm 23/11/2011

I'm broken.
I didn't actually get my first period until well into high school, probably 16 or so. I remember taking the ASVAB test and feeling the release of unholy hell. I was not allowed to leave the auditorium until the testing was completed. When we were finally able to leave the auditorium, I ran to the bathroom and well, I was thankful I was wearing a long shirt that day. I called my mother to have her give permission for me to leave school and come home so I could change clothes and clean up.

After that, it was never that bad. Every now and again, I'd get a little spotting here and there, but without any kind of regularity. That's it. I think the longest stretch was probably five years without having to worry about buying tampons or pads and not having to worry about carrying an emergency supply with me, you know, just in case.

This past September, I started cramping. Except, I thought I had really bad gas. It wasn't gas, which I discovered the next morning. I spent seven days taking ibuprofen and acetaminophen like it was candy. Changing pads and tampons every hour on the hour. Thankfully, the flow lessened during the night so I could at least sleep through the night without waking up looking like I had been repeatedly stabbed. After the week was over, I thought, "Hmm, that was interesting. Hopefully that was the last go of that."

Last Wednesday I woke up to discover that it came back. I put on my brave face, stopped and Walgreen's and stocked up on supplies and returned to the usage of pain relievers as candy. It was WORSE this time around. I was afraid to leave my house on Friday for fear of bleeding on everything and everyone and having rocks thrown at me. Showering was something out of "Carrie". I had never understood why there was so much blood during that scene. I understand now.

Today seems to be the last hurrah of "Aunt Flo", but now I wonder, is this going to be a common occurrence from here on out? Did my body "fix" itself? Has my money saving lack of womanly attribute finally run its course? *sigh* I wish I knew. What I do know is that this is ridiculous. Why is there so much blood? Why am I passing clots? Seriously, clots. Ugh.

I'm working on Thanksgiving. I volunteered to work. I don't go to anyone's house, I don't have family in town. And, honestly, I'm happy for it. It's like a stress free day. But, if given the opportunity to make a few dollars, I'll gladly take it. So I did. I said, "Hey, I'll work! Yaaay me!"

A lot of our customers seem upset that we are going to be open on Thanksgiving and Christmas. I don't know if it's sincere anger that they have that we "have" to work on a holiday, or if it's a show of "solidarity" with us against the "evil bosses" who "make us work during the holidays". Yet, there wasn't this sense of "anger" when we had to work July 4th, Labor Day, Columbus Day, or even Veteran's Day. Just Thanksgiving and Christmas. I don't understand it. Not to mention, when I worked my birthday, maybe a few people commented on "having" to work on my birthday, but I explained that it's just another day, really, and it was on a Monday. I can't go out on a Monday! :D

I also don't see these same people being upset that some grocery stores, pharmacies, hospitals, fire departments, police departments, and movie theaters are open on these oh so holy holidays. If these things were closed on these days people would be in an uproar. Meh, whatever. My coworker and I are wondering if someone will bring us a plate of food tomorrow. That would be fun! :D
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(no subject)
05:12am 24/11/2011 (UTC)
Have you talked to a gynecologist about the new bleeding thing? I don't mean to be alarmist, but it could be more than just extreme irregularity in your periods. Do you have health insurance? (I don't, so I hesitate to go to the doctor even more than I used to.) Take care of yourself...

I love Thanksgiving. I denounce the original meaning of it, choosing to just let it be a day of thanks, but I love it. I was very happy to hear that Trader Joe's is closed tomorrow. But, you know, not everyone cares about any specific holiday, and there might be people who work there that would rather be working and making some money. I'm very happy to have the day off, but would also be happy to have the pay I'm missing. *shrug*
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(no subject)
05:27am 24/11/2011 (UTC)
No insurance (again). I'll eventually get things figured out to "fix" everything that's wrong with me. Until then, I'll just keep eating beans. Mmmm beans. Mmmmmmm chili.

I'm happy that people are getting the time off that want it. Like, if TJ's (or any other company really) took a vote of the employees "Hey, who wants to work these really big holidays?" and then everyone was all "Ewwww no way!" and they decided to close, that would be cool. Which, actually, is kind of what happened at my job. Myself and another employee told one of the owners, "Hey, we're willing to work those days. So, you know, if you want to give us hours and stuff." since they historically have been closed on the "big" holidays.
I guess I'm mostly irritated by the false outrage, or at least false to me, that they are upset over the coffee girl having to work, but not the police or pharmacist. You know?
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(no subject)
11:23pm 27/11/2011 (UTC)
You're probably going to have to take the financial hit -- the next time you have this problem, you'll either going to have to go to El Rio or to the emergency room. It could be endometriosis, which will need treatment. :(

At the very least, you might want to go to Planned Parenthood for some birth control pills. It may help control it.
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